Missing Something
by bjont
Summary: Sanada Genichiroh watches and hurts for Atobe Keigo, who, he quickly discovers, refuses to hurt for himself.


Well, the Tango Pair has been my OTP for quite some time now, so I figured it was about time I posted a piece for them again. I'm actually quite fond of this. It's my first time writing in second person, but I enjoyed it. It was interesting, especially for a character like Sanada. In any case, the Tango Pair definitely does not get enough love, so I'm attempting to spread it. -spreads like mad- Well, without further ado..

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**Missing Something**

You watch, barely feeling the rain as it bites through your thin shirt and saturates your skin. He leans forward, wrapping his fingers around the chain-linked fence, his eyes trained on the figure standing on the courts, wrapped in another's embrace. Tezuka Kunimitsu leans down and kisses Fuji Syuusuke gently and Atobe Keigo turns away, his fingers slipping from their perch and falling lifelessly to his side. You stand, unmoving, as he begins to walk away, feeling the rain for the first time. His arms come up to wrap around his torso, a feeble attempt to protect himself from the sudden cold. You wonder what it would be like to cradle him that way, before remembering the way he gazed so longingly at Tezuka and almost laugh at your own foolishness. You remember, for what feels like the millionth time, that he doesn't want you. Doesn't notice you, standing there, watching him with eyes that promise safety from the pain you know causes his suffering. You know, because it causes your suffering, too.

He disappears out of sight and your eyes flick back to where Tezuka stands, gazing lovingly at Fuji, who is smiling up at him, the raindrops kissing his face while they burn your skin ruthlessly. You have to fight the urge to run down and rip them apart and shout at Tezuka, telling him that while he is wrapped in the warmth of his own love Atobe is dying, fighting for his life as the cold rejection rips at his fragile figure. But you don't. You walk away, in the opposite direction, knowing that you couldn't stand to see Atobe rescued by anyone other than yourself. And for that, you hate everything about you.

You walk into a bookshop and the patrons standing around, flipping meaninglessly through books they'll never read, never understand, give you strange looks. You ignore them and walk to the back, where they keep the classics that everyone still pretends to enjoy. You've slowly worked your way through the Japanese novels and now, as you reach for a copy of Shakespeare's _Romeo and Juliet,_ someone chuckles from behind you and you turn, wrapping your fingers around the spine of the book tightly as you come face to face with Atobe. He is, as you are, soaked through entirely, and his hair hangs in his eyes, shadowing his expression. The laugh was cold, and his lips, thin and pale, twitch slightly in the silence.

"Atobe," you hear yourself mumble. He does not answer, doesn't even look at you, simply reaches past you and pulls _Othello_ from the shelf.

"Shakespeare wanted you to sympathize with Romeo and Juliet," he informs you suddenly, lifting his face to the light and gazing at you with grey eyes. "He wanted you to cry, to weep for their love, which was doomed from the very beginning and you know that without even opening the book."

"I haven't read it," you inform him, but he shakes his head.

"It doesn't matter. That is what he wanted, wants, you to do. Are you going to, Sanada? Will you mourn for Romeo and Juliet, who had everything and more stolen from them?" You do not answer immediately, but consider his question carefully. He is watching you, his face an unreadable mixture of emotions. Will you? You don't know. It's true, you know the story without even opening the book. It has come to represent too much to be ignored. And then, you know.

"No," you say. "No."

"Why not?" Atobe asks, and his voice tells you that you have chosen the right answer.

"Because I cannot sympathize with a coward," you reply, and Atobe raises his eyebrows. "I don't believe in the easy way out," you offer as elaboration, and Atobe smiles.

"Did Juliet take the easy way out, Sanada?" he murmurs, taking the book from your hands and opening it.

"Yes." Your voice is confident. "She should have continued living for Romeo's sake, if not her own."

"But she loved him," Atobe points out, leafing through the pages with long, elegant fingers. "She wanted to be with him."

"She could have been with him in her mind," you insist. "She was afraid of living without him." Atobe does not answer immediately, but continues flipping from page to page, his eyes sliding over the phrases.

_"I have night's cloak to hide me from their eyes, And but thou love me, let them find me here. My life were better ended by their hate, Than death prorogued, wanting of thy love." _he recites, before looking up, a faint smile playing about his lips. "Do you understand that passage, Sanada?" he asks. You nod.

"He would rather die than live without her love," you translate, wondering suddenly if this is the way Atobe feels.

"And what do you think of Romeo, for this?" Atobe inquires.

"That he is a fool, for he has no chance of ever gaining Juliet's love if he is dead and gone from the world," you reply. Atobe smiles and closes the book.

"You surprise me, Sanada," he says, pressing the book into your hand. "I wouldn't have expected such thoughtfulness from you." With that, he begins to walk away, but you reach out and grab his wrist, and he turns to gaze at you with those incriminating eyes.

"Atobe," you whisper, "do you agree with me? Is Romeo a fool?" Atobe is silent for a long moment. He does not look at you, but you stare at him, unable to wrench your eyes away.

"Is he?" he finally murmurs. "Yes, Sanada, he is a fool, but not only because death bars him from ever gaining Juliet's love." You inhale. "He is a fool," he continues, "because if Juliet turns away, it means that he is mistaken in thinking that the flame which burns in her name is eternal. And if he is prepared to die with that false flame, it means that he will never encounter the true warmth of requited love." Atobe finally meets your stare, and his eyes bore into yours. You exhale and release his wrist. He does not move, and you realize then that Atobe Keigo is far from dying. For unlike Tezuka Kunimitsu, he does not need another's love to protect him from the biting cold. And, as you follow him out of the bookstore, into the driving rain, you remember the way you watched him and took no notice of the ruthless wind until he walked away and you had nothing left. And now, as you run beside him, your fingers brushing and interlacing and pulling apart and interlacing again, comfortably numb in the sleet, you feel something inside you burst and a strange warmth floods your chest and you stop, and he stops with you and looks up at you, curious. You reach out, in a moment of insanity, and place your hand over his heart, and recognize the heat that seeps into your fingers and smile, a small, unnoticeable twitch of your lips that Atobe sees and returns with one of his own, before he jerks you forward again, for the sleet has become hail and as wonderfully numb as you have become, the recognition of yourself in another reminds you of reality and your cheeks begin to sting in the cold, and suddenly, you laugh, realizing that Atobe is feeling the same pain and the same warmth and that together, you can succeed everywhere that Romeo and Juliet failed.

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The italicized excerpt is from Shakespeare's _Romeo and Juliet_, over which I hold no ownership.

Eep. I am overcome with love for these two. I hope I did them justice. -hides under Tango Pair blanket- I think they're quite a tormented couple, more so than people give them credit (?) for. Reviews are loved, of course, but a Tango Pair oneshot/multi-chaptered piece from one of YOU would be loved EVEN MORE. (Yes, it's possible.) If you wants prompts, beta services, ANYTHING, I would be more than happy to provide them if it meant more Tango Pair. Spread the love. -spreads-


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